Letter to dad...

Tim brought this to my attention and said to read it...he liked what it said...from local paper today...

A Letter to my Dad

By Jim Sida 01-28-2009



Dear Dad:
I wanted to write you this letter to get your take on what I might describe as a cloud hovering over our nation, a very dark cloud I might add.

As you know Barack Obama has been elected as our 44th President and he has taken over as the leader of our country in very difficult times.

While I am very sure that our former President, George W. Bush would rather have had greater success, I’m afraid that he left quite a mess.

With wars being waged on two fronts, the global fight against terrorism and a world economy in chaos, I can’t say that I would want to be in President Obama’s shoes.

Quite frankly, I pray for him and for his success for many reasons, but Dad, this is why I’m writing.

You see there is this radio talk show host who publicly said that he hoped that President Obama fails in his quest as our leader.

I know that you’re going to tell me not to worry about this guy, and yes I remember your trademark saying, “Life is too short to be little”.

I get the positive nature of your philosophy, but here’s the problem Dad, I was watching the news and they reported that American companies laid off 73,000 workers today because of the economic doldrums that we find ourselves in.

The announcer said it was the largest one-day mass layoff of workers in modern U.S. history.

This comes on the heels of the recent lay-off of about 350 workers here in Mesquite and that’s a lot of people out of work for a little town like ours.

Let me get back to this Limbaugh guy.

When I first heard that he uttered that he wanted President Obama to fail, I chalked it up to one of his bombastic, off the cuff comments.

Boy was I ever surprised when I listened to his comment and discovered that he said it in all seriousness and with a straight face; clearly not with tongue in cheek.

So here is my question to you Dad – Why do you think that Limbaugh would want our President to fail?

Doesn’t he care about all of the good hard working Americans that will suffer if President Obama fails?

Maybe it’s because he’s a multi-millionaire that he doesn’t care what happens to the rest of us?

I just don’t get it Dad, maybe the reason Limbaugh’s obscene comment strikes me so hard is because I remember you telling me of your life during the Great Depression and living in the dustbowl plains of Oklahoma.

I remember that you told me that starvation stalked your family during those hard times and that there were many occasions that you literally had nothing to eat.

I remember you telling me of a reoccurring nightmare you had, in which you and your family were starving to death.

I was touched when you told me that after one of these bad dreams that you forced yourself to imagine riding your horse across the rolling hills of Oklahoma in order for you to ward of the memory of the nightmare and go back to sleep.

Did anyone back then say that they wanted President Roosevelt to fail?

I don’t know Dad, maybe it’s because we’ve lived in such affluence for so long that people just can’t imagine that kind of suffering in America today.

I have to tell you, I sure hope they are right by God, because you see, 73,000 good Americans lost their jobs today and it frightens me.

Listen Dad, don’t worry about me as we’ve saved and think that we’ll be able to ride out this storm, but I can’t help but worry about all of the folks who will probably be laid off tomorrow.

I can’t help but worry for those 73,000 souls who woke up this morning only to find out that their lives have been inexorably changed—they are now unemployed.

I especially worry for our neighbors here in Mesquite that are now out of work.

I worry for these families and for their children.

So you see Dad, I am desperately praying for President Obama’s success.

It makes sense doesn’t it Dad, that his success will be collectively all of our success?

Anyway Dad, I’ll quit gabbing and just ask you straight out.

What do you think that we ought to do about this Limbaugh fellow?

I know that you are a wise man and I know that you’ll have the right advice for me regarding this matter.



Dear Son:

You know the First Amendment of our Constitution gives this Limbaugh guy the right to say what he wants, no matter how ridiculous and abhorrent his views are.

Ultimately, I have to think that the vast majority of Americans who listen to his show will utterly reject his silly nonsense.

Additionally, I know that you live in a community with a large population of retired persons.

My guess is that while they aren’t as old as me, I’ll just bet that like you, they remember the Great Depression either through personal experience or through family lore, so I can’t imagine that they would agree with this Limbaugh fellow.

What you tell me is troubling indeed so I do have some advice that might be able to help you and others deal with this nutty broadcaster.

Here is what I think that you must do.

It’s important that you do exactly as I tell you.

You must follow my instructions unfailingly and with great resolve.

Hear me now, the next time you are driving in your car and Mr. Limbaugh comes on the radio, just take a deep breath, then take your right hand off of the drivers’ wheel and calmly move your right hand in the direction of the radio—then turn it off!



As a postscript to this letter and as a matter of full disclosure, my father passed away in 1977. I wish he were here today as I’m sure that he would have given me this advice.

So in honor of his memory I will do just as he would have wanted—turn Rush Limbaugh off.

Third round sutent...

Today is the day for him to start the third round of "Sutent"...last few days he has opened up and said he wished he could sleep on his sides but he can't cause his shoulders hurt...also cause his hips hurt from sleeping on backside all the time...

He's been hurting more last few days too and if I remember right he said the same thing last month right before he went back on the "sutent"...decided yesterday to take naproxen in between lortab and it made a difference to him and wasn't hurting as bad...I still think he is over doing it but only he knows how he feels...he doesn't always express it to me so I ask cause I watch his body language and listen to (whether he realizes it or not) sounds coming from him...

Tam got him a journal asking for information, etc for Christmas....he's been writing in it more and more...another concern is he's talking in his sleep again and this isn't brought on by morphine as he's off that stuff...naproxen is just an anti-imflammatory medicine like for arthritis...as he has that too...last three days I have to re-explain what I just said like he's not understanding what I said so I have to tell him again...I'm hoping its just cause he is worried about finances since we are still waiting to hear from workmans comp on his broken arm and short term disability through work since workmans comp stopped checks on Dec 16, 2008 pending doctors evaulation and it's not the cancer spreading...so it makes me wonder....maybe I'm reading more into it...yep....

Kids got hit with the ice storm and no school...hope they are staying warm and cozy indoors...still wonder bout them...wishin' they lived closer...

I thought my music playlist had some tear jerk songs on it but...Hunter's blog has music that makes me tear up...please continue prayers for that young man...the doctors had to induce his coma state again...just click his name to read his blog and status...

Not sure what is better...going HOME quickly or slowly watch your loved ones go HOME...like with cancer...always wondering do I leave them alone for awhile to do things...not wanting to be away for very long...you don't want to loose any precious time with them...even if you don't do much or talk all the time...their presents is all you really need and love...

Anyway, the doctors office called yesterday and he is scheduled for the CT abdomen/pelvis on Thursday Feb 26th and whole body bone scan on Friday Feb 27th...labs need to be drawn on Tuesday Feb 24th...before tests but also for doctor to see how he's doing as well through the blood work...then see doctor on Wednesday, March 4th to know if the "Sutent" has slowed the cells down or stopped them (put him in remission)...hopefully it has so he's got that extra time...I'd like to see him beat the odds like Patrick Swayze's cancer...not just couple of months but lasted a year and he's still fighting and hoping for another year...I too would like to see that for Tim...

Hoping elf...eryone is doing good weatherwise if not otherwise...much luv to all...have a good day! :D



MySpace Blessings Comments

Sleeping...

We got up late this morning and he was wanting to go to the graveside services for Bonnie at 11 a.m. in Bunkerville...I wasn't feeling up to going but to let him off and sit and wait for him...

We got there late and the services were still going on and I waited...I kept fighting back the tears cause I don't want to be going through this down the road maybe when we're both older but not now...I found the love of my life and I'm not ready to let him go yet...so, I'm praying God will allow him to be here for as long as possible...he offered for Tyke to come by or call if he needed someone to talk with as Tim as been through it with his first wife Pam dying in a single car roll over accident...

After the services, we headed for the post office and got the mail and came home and he immediately laid down...it's been two hours and he's still sleeping...I still feel he over does it being on that leg...I'm just glad the weather was nice and didn't rain on everyone...right now the weather looks awful...like we're going to get more rain...

We are being patient as parents as much as possible...we worry about both our girls...so sometimes we make the first call or even text...see how they are doing!!!!

Also, still waiting on workman's comp finalization of claim which we have 3 more weeks to go to find out and also short term disability through work hasn't come through yet...it's been three weeks...he said he'll make calls next week to give it the rest of the week (through my prompting to wait)...

Unless something else comes up this should be the last posting for a few days to a week...elf...veryone be safe and enjoy your week....lata <3

Sadness...

Today brought sadness...Tim went for coffee with a friend and I was going to do some stuff but you know how one thing leads to another and then you don't get done what you want...

He got back and then we went to see his ma and she is doing well...came home and had lunch in time for him to go to coffee again and I took a nap...was really tired...I woke up feeling like he was over doing it today and worried about him with the way the weather was changing but he got home and said he was fine and wanted to get ready to go to a friend's viewing...pay his respects to Tyk and Barbara and all he knew...I dropped him off at door and Barb took him in and I wasn't up to par to go in so I sat in van off side of premises watching everyone...

It all came flooding back to me when we got the news on Tim and how he was feeling and how we both thought he was on his death bed too soon til we got him off the morphine and saw how with the improvement he's doing getting around again like his old self minus the arm/leg problem...crying less and letting my guard up and letting it slip to the back of my mind that all is okay...ha...sitting there watching everyone...I realized that's going to be me one of these days!!! I'm not sure I'm going to be able to do it...I text Tam and she immediately called me...I explained who had passed away and seeing everyone and how that's going to happen one day...I just cried...so it's fresh in my mind again...I do hope this medicine has slowed down the cancer growth and he goes into remission and he's got that extra time with us...as there is no cure for kidney cancer yet...mRCC...so I will pray and hope that extra time is coming...

Hope all is well with everyone else and have a good week to all and one more thing...pray for Hunter Thurston who has swelling on the brain from an accident...you can read the family blog on www.hunterthurston1.blogspot.com

Be safe and good night...

Brother n law...

I was out Friday doing an errand and when I got home Tim said our brother n law Doug called and was in Cedar City and would like to stop and visit before going onto California...

I called him back and he was at the Arizona mile marker 36...I figured he'd be here pretty quik...gave him about half hour as I was talking with Tim and then I headed over to meet him at Oasis truck parking to pick him up...



Doug is good and looks like he has lost some weight...we chatted and he was really glad to see how well Tim is doing...(up until he saw the doctor on Dec 4 before starting his second round of "Sutent" he was....struggling to get around, eat, sleep, drink...I always had a "babysitter" for him when I had to go somewhere or my doctor appointments...I really thought he was on his death bed...until doctor realized that with the morphine patch it wasn't helping and making him worse and Tim went cold turkey off the morphine pills as well for couple of days and tried again...it started all over again...so doctor said even the morphine pills were poisoning his body to get him off it right away and go back to the lortabs)...

His doctor appointment this past Thursday, doc wanted him to get some physical therapy...he said no, he'd do what he could at home and that's why he's getting around more on the cane and building back up his muscle strength...but he is doing all this with the cane...his left fractured arm-he still doesn't have much mobility to it and we are assuming the fracture is healed???...I still worry he is over doing it...when he lays down to rest most the time he zonks out...sleep...:D

So with this said Doug and Sharon have offered help whenever and wherever we need them but like with everyone who has offered help...we appreciate it and am keeping everyone in mind and I will make those calls when the time comes...it means a lot to us...

We got a few pics (he is going to email me the ones he took) before taking him back to his truck and heading out for California then drop off that load get another one and head to Texas and switch trailers with another driver and head back to Phoenix and hope he has another load to pick up there...be safe and take care...

Follow up...

He had the follow up appointment with the oncologist...everything looking good on blood work and the doctor is curious to do the CT abdomen/kidney and nuclear whole body bone scan to see if the "Sutent" has slowed the progression of the tumors, put it into remission or if there are more tumors...if good he will continue on sutent...if not then he stops it and takes a break and then the doctor will try something else...

The tests should be scheduled for end of February to get results back to the doctor and then see him end of the first week of March to know whether he continues the sutent or stops before going to something else...also, alot will depend on whether his work will allow him to apply for long term disability after short term ends at end of March...at least hopefully until social security comes through...because when the insurance goes over to cobra...for him alone-it will cost $498 a month, for both of us $1104.00...yeah, ouch!!!!! He says depending how everything comes out if not the way he hopes for then he will drop everything and just wait...it's not what he wants to do but there's no way anyone can afford cobra insurance...no wonder a lot of people don't pick up insurance or even see doctors unless they really need to....which is about what I'm ready to do...only as needed.....!!! even with the insurance right now....

That's why it seems disappointing when you follow the rules and try to do everything that is needed and then it's always a waiting game and so much RED tape...and you feel like you keep getting doors slapped in your face...how do people keep up their optimism??? Oh well, just keep trying to go with the flow and HOPE, PRAY and have FAITH it all works out...

Not much else to tell....have gr8t wkend and a TGIF!!!!!!!!!! Be safe and take care...gOoD nIgHt 8D

Workman's Comp...

He had his appointment this morning with workman's comp doctor to determine the PPD (permanent partial disability) and to whether the case is ready to close. He got wore out from doing the different tests and he was sore and tired when the doctor got done...but we still had another stop at the hospital to get his blood work for the oncologist...I didn't argue with him about using the wheelchair...he said he would use his cane that is wasn't that far....uhmmmmmmmmm...we got home and he said he over did it again by walking too much on that right leg even with cane...

He'll be probably sleeping most of tomorrow and staying off that leg as much as possible till Thursday morning for oncologist appointment...but I convinced him that it's too much walking at Dixie...so he agreed to use wheel chair...

Anyway, the workman's comp doctor said with him writing up his reports and sending them to the insurance and the insurance doing their processing it will probably be as long as a month before we get a determination letter from workman's comp...more waiting....ughhhh...that's the hardest part especially for him...I have to keep telling him...lol...to be patient...I don't really have much time...don't know when...well, let's hope that when you get your next bone scan in early March it'll show that the cancer has slowed down and given you more time....

Yes, even though he over did it today...he still had a friend pick him up and go to coffee with the guys...I just hope he doesn't pick up any flu bug or cold...not sure how it would affect him with his immune systems compromised with the cancer...that's why the doctors have said to just cut back on his smoking and not quit...his body is fighting too much right now with the cancer...

Today is/was a big Day for the Nation...let's pray and hope for new changes and a better ecomony....take care and good night...BE SAFE!!!!

Weekly Update...

Hi...me and my sister Robin peeking through the window to see everyone...lol...here's the weekly update....he's been on "coreg" for a week now and his blood sugars are stable as long as he watches what he eats...I test him once a day but do several at fasting in the morning and then did a few tests before breakfast and did the same for lunch and dinner....so "Coreg" hasn't brought his blood sugars up any higher...so far everything looking good. His blood pressure is better but his pulse still is a bit high like in upper 90's and l01-102...so we will try two a day and see how that goes...see if the rapid pulse rate won't come down a bit more....

He's been a bit bored and wanting to get out and restless not sure what to do as he has a tendency to over do things...it usually sets him back a few days to rest up when he's over exerted himself...like Tuesday he wanted cleaned up and showered, walking by using his cane more and then to call a friend to have him come by and get him for coffee...walking more with the cane...walking out into the back yard with the cane...by the time he got back from coffee he was ready for a nap...slept most of yesterday too..

He's done with the second round of "Sutent" for the cancer and he'll be off it for 14 days and start again on the 29Th if the doctor says to continue when he sees the doctor on the 22Nd...he's feeling more discomfort with his right arm that's not broken...he's anxious to call s.s. but I told don't bother as it's too early for any results yet...be patient...

We look for any news about Patrick Swayze on his condition...he went into the hospital Friday, Jan 9, 2009 morning last week with pneumonia and he's improving but not much else. Our prayers are with him and that he continues to fight as he said in the 20/20 Special last week....

Ohhhhhhhhhh, the weather has been so nice...being able to open the front and back doors...until I see he's covering up with a blanket and then I close the doors...don't want him getting chilled and then come down sick...my sister has been sunbathing last couple days and is showing tan lines....plus bike riding...

I don't know of any other news to tell you until next week after the doctors appointments on Tuesday (job related) and then Thursday (cancer related)...if anything comes up I will post it...

Elf...eryone enjoy their weekend coming up, be safe and don't take life for granted!
Much luv to all...good night :D

New medicine...

A new medicine was added today for him on his elevated blood pressure/rapid pulses...he's to take one Coreg daily and if the rapid pulses don't decline he's to take two a day...any wheezing involved stop but he's to go back in two weeks to see how he is doing...leaflet info said possible side effects were raised blood sugars...ouch, just what we don't need...

The doctor also took blood work for an A1C...it's a blood test for his blood sugars and somehow it gets a three month average reading...if it's under 7% the doctor won't be too worried as that is a good average but to still watch what he eats...if it's higher the doctor will put him on a diabetic med...

The bone doctor told workman's comp that his broken arm (in normal circumstances would have been healed by 12/16/08 the cut off date of his last check) That's why the evaluation appointment to determine the closing of the case...but, we also found out that the short term disability will kick in but the turn around time for a check to start coming would be about two weeks and the short term disability at work would not start from when short term disability started but when his accident was on 9-25-08 so the six months for the short term disability would be over at the end of March lets say not in July...So we are hoping that social security disability is approved before all this happens so there is a check coming in and still be on the health insurance what is called cobra (we pay more out of our pockets for the premiums)...so we are still playing the waiting game....hopefully, we won't have to go the next step and start long term disability.

Our youngest Tam, came home this afternoon to get things ready and packed to go back to college on Monday but has to check in on Sunday. With a new Henderson library branch opening this Saturday and her going back to college-her schedule will be hectic and she'll be working every other Saturday at the new Galleria Mall Library...so we will probably see less of her....

My sister Robin made it in last night around midnight from Phoenix and we are happ:D to see her...she will be busy as usual with work when she gets back as she has new training starting...haven't seen her in a few years...she is looking good.

Tim and I watched the "Barbara Walters Special-Patrick Swayze The Truth"...he has terminal pancreatic cancer and a lot of similarities as Tim...what Patrick and his wife Lisa were saying is how and what we have pretty much been saying and feeling...I feel it is a must see if you have a chance when its on air again or if you can see it online somehow, somewhere....a very heart warming and touching story...I do hope his new season premiere of "The Beast" on A&E is good and he's able to do a second season of filming...Patrick has beaten the odds of a few months to a year so far...he's hoping for another year...I pray Tim has that same outcome of beating the odds!

I pray this finds elf...eryone doing well and so far enjoying their New Year! Good night and sweet dreams....<3

Appointment...

Well, he has an appointment on Thursday, Jan 8th to see the family doctor as the oncologist said he needs to see the other doctor for possible diabetes, high blood pressures even if "Sutent" is causing the problem...he has eight more days left on it and then off two weeks again...until he starts his third round on January 29th...

His other appointment got bumped up to Jan 20th for the re-evaluation on his left fractured arm through workmens comp...so that's a whole month without a check coming in...we have a call put into the insurance to see if that can be changed as far as getting another check or two until the appointment since it has been moved to a later date.

We went for a short drive and checked the mail this afternoon (he stayed in the van)and by the time we got home and back into his wheelchair...he said he was wore out...he was saying on the way home that maybe he could go to coffee and visit with the guys but not sure what he would drink since coffee upsets his stomach...I don't think he would last that long not after the trip to the post office and back...

The ramp is really nice...on sunn:D days he can go out the front door pretty much on his own and wheel out into the driveway and sit in the sun and visit with Maria if she is out...lol...he even wheeled over to the street mailbox and checked it for junk mail, etc to empty out this morning...I have to admit I kind of kept an eye out for him...he already said he wouldn't take the wheelchair all the way down to the post office...no way!

I did a bit of laundry and even washed Jack's bed cover...omg...when I took that off he had sooooooooooooooo much hair that got through the fabric onto the foam bed cushion...I had to vacuum it like crazy....then after I put the cover back on he didn't want to get out of it and lay down with me like he usually does when I lay down to rest or watch TV...lol...he's so funn:D...

Not much else to say and wish elf...eryone a good week and will keep you posted...much luv to all and good night :]

Released....

The pics aren't the best but gives you an idea...wound was bigger than that
and it looks red cause the bandaid I took off...kind of looks like a sunburst
on how it healed...these pics don't show it well...if you click on either pics it'll make it bigger and it'll show it better...it really isn't as bad as it looks...honest :D
p.s. any pic on left side of blog can be clicked on to view bigger and also has a caption when you do...

I have been cancelling my wound clinic appts after going Dec 19th as I have been too tired or the weather...I finally went back today to hopefully get RELEASED...I walks in and the waiting room is full with patients...ughhhhhhhhhhhh....an hour behind...overbooked and short staffed....no problem I was sure I was going to be RELEASED....to make it easier on them I showed Phyllis and she said hang on a minute and we'll see if we can get you released in a second...whoo hoo....shucks...NOT...the doctor needs a pic before releasing....so I wait and just before I goes in I see two doctors leave back door and found out after going in they were headed for surgery...I'd have to come back Monday and see the other doctor to be released, ahhhhhhhh...I'll wait til Friday Jan 9th on my next appt...Steven was teasing me...the head nurse was able to YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! RELEASE ME!!!!!!!!!!! Again, I will have to say the wound clinic personnel are ALL wonderful people and I will miss them especially Mandi...I took to her right off...bestest bed side manner and very warm hearted person....
I do suggest to anyone who has an open wound that isn't healing to have your doctor refer you there at DRMC old hospital wound clinic...they are really good...you can mention my name...they may not remember me after time but Mandi even worked with Tom Price,C-PA...if anyone remembers him...

Well, his blood pressures are coming down and his blood sugars but I am going to have to keep track of his vitals...and what he eats...the Sutent is affecting them unless his blood work comes back with anything too high or low...I will be calling docs on Monday to see if family doc or oncologist wants to handle definitely diagnosing him borderline diabetic, etc...and get RX for blood sugar strips so my strips aren't getting used up with me on insulin, the pills and diet quit working for me...

We feel really blessed to have this time together...even with our moments like this morning when he hugged me and I fell apart and started crying and he apologized for making me cry and I said it's not his fault...it's in those tender moments I can't hold it back...

There are times we both feels our days run into others and we need to check the calendar to see for sure which day it is...or me in another world seems like cause I'm trying to make sure everything gets done...I told him he's going to have to remind at times if I forget to do something cause I'm trying to get things done....like hon, "I need fresh water" which reminds me...oooops...I got to do it now whilest I'm thinkin' bout it...lol...I haven't done it yet...brb....okay, I'm back to which he reminded me I said I was going to the grocery store even at 8pm tonight...I think I will after I finish this...it will be easier than trying to get up in the morning and then not get out of here til late morning...booooooo...I like shopping when not crowded or noisy....

Well, kids will be going back to skool on Monday as well as our younget back to UNLV on the 12th....so we'll hardly see her especially if her job has her working five days plus some Saturdays....Tam and Shaun have set a date for 10/10/10 to get married...time to finish college and get her teaching job and for them to save for the wedding...

If I going to get shopping done guess better go for now and keep ya posted...much luv to all...be safe!!!

High...

Well, his blood pressures are still bit high...I decided to do every bodies blood sugars this morning cause of the passion fruit smoothies Tam made and the mini chocolate chip pancakes I made...yeah, yummmmmmm.....Tam (124) is okay and my (183)was okay cause I take insulin and no I didn't drink the smoothie that would have really sent me through the roof even with the insulin...and his whooooooooooooooooooooooooooa HIGHER than mine.....247....YEAH now I can see why his blood pressures are HIGH...okay now for some changes drastic....guess time to go back to my green smoothie and try to get him to drink it....and more protein....lean....I can see why he's been feeling hungry and sleeping alot too....I thought it was just the pain meds...

Oh, by the way HAPP:D NEW YEAR Elf...eryone!!!!!! tehe tehe....

We saw the New Year in by watching "Dick Clark's New Year Rock'n Eve" and channel 3 news NBC Vegas....and I'm disappointed they changed the height of where they shoot off the fireworks...300 feet lower instead off the tall casinos...and it SUCKED!!!!!!! It's not the same.....boooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo ;(

Today, cool sunn:D and b e a u t i f u l .....ful of H O P E ....and I need prayers for my mom....health issues and needs a new caretaker....I wish I was there to help her too....luv u mom...prayers for Charlene and her family...prayers for Cheri Jean and her family...prayers for Sandra/Jeffrey and family...prayers for Maria/Efraim and family...

Better go and elf...eryone be safe today and in the New Year!!!!!!!!!!!!! Much luv to all...